If you’d told me years ago that my life would be shaped so deeply by a language you can’t hear, I probably would have laughed loudly. But here we are.
My name is Gardian, and NZ Sign Language (NZSL) has been part of my world for as long as I can remember. My aunty was born Deaf, and during my childhood, especially while my mum was recovering from strokes during pregnancy, my Deaf aunty and her Deaf friends often cared for me. As the first-born niece, I was treasured, included, and absolutely surrounded by signing hands, expressive faces, and a deep sense of connection.
Maybe that’s where it started.
In 2022, I enrolled at AUT, hoping to become a professional NZSL interpreter. I’d always loved sign language, which made sense, really because I’m naturally loud, animated, expressive, and allergic to sitting still. NZSL felt like home before I had words for why.
During my second year of study, I was diagnosed with Autism and ADHD. It explained a lot, including why that year I failed a required paper. I needed that pass to continue interpreting my studies, so I tried again the following year.
While waiting, I didn’t step away – I stepped in.
I kept attending NZSL night classes. I volunteered at Deaf Club. I showed up to Deaf events. I went to Deaf camps. I immersed myself fully in the language, culture, and community, not as a student ticking boxes, but as someone who desperately wanted to belong.
And I did.
The Deaf community welcomed me with open arms and hands. I felt accepted, valued, and understood, sometimes without a single word being spoken. For the first time, I truly felt like I had found my place in the world.
I didn’t pass that paper a second time, and instead of seeing that as a failure, I chose a different path, graduating with a Bachelor of Arts in NZSL and Deaf Studies. Sometimes the destination shifts, but the purpose stays the same.
Not long after, I began working part time at Auckland Deaf Society as the NZSL Night Classes and Venues Administrator. I loved organising classes, supporting tutors and students, and helping more people access NZSL. Promoting the language wasn’t just the job, it felt personal.
Then 2024 hit hard. I had a heart attack in June, followed by a stroke in December, which resulted in hearing loss and activated my Auditory Processing Disorder (APD). I now wear hearing aids. Life had quietly, and not so quietly, shifted me into a new identity: Hard of Hearing.
And then, something incredible happened.
I applied for two similar roles with two different organisations and was offered a position at Ka Puta Ka Ora Emerge Aotearoa, working within the Deaf Mental Health Team.
Today, I’m proudly Autistic, ADHD, Hard of Hearing, and someone who works every day to support our Deaf community.
NZSL, inclusion, and advocacy allow me to be my authentic self, not some of the time, but all of the time. They allow me to serve some of our most vulnerable and at-risk people with empathy, respect, and lived understanding.
As we celebrate NZSL Week and 20 years of NZSL as an official language of Aotearoa, I invite you to do one simple thing:
👋 Learn some sign language.
Don’t delay. Don’t overthink it. Just start.
You might be surprised by who you connect with, and what you discover about yourself, when you choose to listen with your eyes.
